Thursday 26 July 2007

Don't believe the hype

Some days when its like this, the middle of my rest days, Mrs Lima and all my mates are at work and its pouring with rain I sit in front of the box I get bored and start flicking the channels. I usually get to about channel 121 and I pause briefly. You can usually guarantee that there will be one of the following programs: Street wars/Car wars/Street crime UK 4/ Cameraman running after fat coppers UK 7/ Drunken domestics in the street UK15/ Chavs on the run UK 19 or similar.

For a moment I watch with some interest, remembering the anticipation with which I applied to join the ‘FORCE’. I remember the excitement of my first shift, thinking when do the chases start? Ah well maybe they start on day two, bit too much to expect on the first day.

The thing is with these shows is that they don’t really reflect real life policing. These programs show a highly concentrated, over hyped, highly edited version of policing. I wonder how many hours the camera men have to follow the coppers around to get an half hour show? Even then some of the footage is very mundane.

I’m not saying I never get foot chases or pursuits but if a camera man had been following me around for the last two years they wouldn’t even fill up a half hour program. I actually work in a very busy part of a large city, it just doesn’t happen like it does on TV.

To anyone not yet in the police and thinking about joining please remember. For every five minutes of excitement there are months of paperwork and dealing with trivial squabbles amongst the underclass.

What also winds me up is you may see someone driving a stolen car like a loon, putting dozens of lives at risk for miles and miles, or a drunk spitting, swearing and attacking police officers, then at the end of the program, while every one has got up to put the kettle on and whilst being drowned out by the theme tune you will hear Jamie Theakston say either the following: The male arrested in the stolen car who drove across three counties whilst high on drugs and failed to stop for police was given a referral order. Or no charges were brought against the drunk woman who bit off a bouncers ear and spat in the police officers face

Here’s just one example of the infamous Pat and Carl.

Monday 23 July 2007

The Flying Squad !!!



Watch and enjoy. Listen to the female officer trying not to laugh, this chap is obviously a boss as well. I bet he'd go nuts if he knew this video was on the net. If you know where its from and who he is let me know.

Saturday 21 July 2007

The Knife

Here's a tale that I was told whilst in training. Although it sounds like a tall story judging by the miss match of random knives, forks and various other kitchen utensils lurking in the cutlery draw in our nick I can see it could be true.

Some years ago there was a small rural station that the powers that be had decided needed knocking down and a new station needed to be built in its place. So the old station needed to be cleared out.

As one of the officers was clearing out the property store he came across some photos of a murder that had happened many years previously. There were of course pictures of the victim, the murder scene and the murder weapon. The murder weapon was a distinctive long wooden handled bread knife, with a serrated edge, and where there was once two prongs on the end of the knife there was now only one.

Hmmm, the officer thought to himself this knife looks familiar. He then realised this murder weapon had someway found its way into the cutlery draw and they had been using it for all these years since!!!

Monday 16 July 2007

Balearic Beats

You may have noticed a lack of posts recently, you may not have, you may not care less. Anyway the reason for this has been AL. Yay!!

As I was sat in the sun on a certain Spanish island sipping San Miguel, I was still thinking about work. In particular I remembered a story that a friend of mine told me about when he and a group of his mates visited this party island.

One night he and his mates were out drinking and they thought it would be a good laugh to jump around in the fountains in the middle of the central plaza. A good laugh it was too, until the Spanish police turned up.

Who promptly dragged them out of the fountains, kept hold of them and then proceeded to beat them with their batons.

Understandably this had the desired effect my friend and his group never went near the fountains ever again and every time they saw a Spanish copper they made sure they kept their heads down and their mouths shut.

This raises several issues, surely this approach is more effective than a £80 fine?

Secondly where’s the JPLAN in that? Where’s the five step appeal? Where’s the conflict resolution model? Spain is part of the EU, presumably they have the human rights act too, how can they get away with this type of behaviour?

This video of Spanish police at an anti Iraq war protest illustrates the behaviour I’m talking about.




How can they get away with this?? Imagine the outcry if this footage was of an incident in the UK.

Friday 13 July 2007

I think I've flooded the engine.



Watch and enjoy. Comments please.

I like the way the driver pauses, thinks about it, then goes for it, OOOPS!!!!